I have always had a strong desire to form deep bonds. But somewhere something went amiss. Either I lost the knack for it, becoming too transient in life or maybe they just shrugged me off too easily. The bonds are still there. Apparently deep and genuine. But they are so temporary. The kinds that are felt for a few minutes or for few hours once in a week or two. The kinds that do not latch on to you or where maybe you don't latch on to them.
What is it about this age. Or maybe this generation. When did we start running after quantity over quality in emotions and relations. Why is the unwavering, unflinching, devoted attention of one person day after day everyday not satisfactory anymore. Why do we run after the cheap thrills of a chase. The seemingly hollow security of being the focal point of attention.
And when you feel it, it feels like everything. Where words are not needed and a touch or a look is enough. Where the connection is so strong that you can feel it across a room. And then a week down the line, with silence on both ends, with no need to pursue that connection by either party, you wonder if it was in fact real. You wonder if maybe it was just the imagination of a desperate mind. The desperation to understand and be understood.
Why have we become so apt at the day to day mundane task of trying to live a normal life. Why has all this BS about "How to attract a man", "How to make a woman fall in love with you", "How to reignite the fire", "Does she actually love you", "Signs hes cheating on you", et al taken over our lives. Why have we stopped being ourselves. So afraid to lose that every step is calculated and re-calculated. And the games become a necessity. For love and happiness. Let us just be.
And to those few men and women in my life, I say-I did love you. For however brief a moment. It was real. It was heartfelt. I am sorry that I could not sustain it and I am sorry that I didn't try harder.
I hope, maybe you feel the same. Divided in love, let us atleast be together in our guilt.
P.S. this picture holds so true for me... I guess it holds true for many out there-
What is it about this age. Or maybe this generation. When did we start running after quantity over quality in emotions and relations. Why is the unwavering, unflinching, devoted attention of one person day after day everyday not satisfactory anymore. Why do we run after the cheap thrills of a chase. The seemingly hollow security of being the focal point of attention.
And when you feel it, it feels like everything. Where words are not needed and a touch or a look is enough. Where the connection is so strong that you can feel it across a room. And then a week down the line, with silence on both ends, with no need to pursue that connection by either party, you wonder if it was in fact real. You wonder if maybe it was just the imagination of a desperate mind. The desperation to understand and be understood.
Why have we become so apt at the day to day mundane task of trying to live a normal life. Why has all this BS about "How to attract a man", "How to make a woman fall in love with you", "How to reignite the fire", "Does she actually love you", "Signs hes cheating on you", et al taken over our lives. Why have we stopped being ourselves. So afraid to lose that every step is calculated and re-calculated. And the games become a necessity. For love and happiness. Let us just be.
And to those few men and women in my life, I say-I did love you. For however brief a moment. It was real. It was heartfelt. I am sorry that I could not sustain it and I am sorry that I didn't try harder.
I hope, maybe you feel the same. Divided in love, let us atleast be together in our guilt.
P.S. this picture holds so true for me... I guess it holds true for many out there-
The ability to sit down with another person & talk for hours, about anything & everything, is more attractive to me than anything else. -KF
ReplyDeleteThat always is attractive. But that really is not what the post is about....Anyway...is it rude that I am not sure who KF is?
ReplyDelete